User:Yar Kramer/Paranoia house rules

These are the "house rules" developed by Wikipedia user Yar Kramer for the immensely fun role-playing game Paranoia! Fun is mandatory! Failure to have fun is treason!

This page has Red Clearance. That means that the players of the game, as opposed to the GM, are allowed to read this page! The GM has another page to look at. WARNING!!! The GM's page has clearance Ultraviolet! That means players are not allowed to view it or refer to it! Player knowledge of the rules is treason and punishable by summary execution! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!

Read this first, it's got a lot of important setting info.

These rules are sort of a combination of Second Edition and Paranoia XP, just combining the bits I liked.

What You Must Forget

Other (non-fun) RPGs have various common elements that Paranoia does not have. You ought to forget them:

• Cooperation. Assume all the other players are out to get you. Don't help players if you can possibly avoid it. Don't even share any information if you can possibly avoid it (it's a good idea to pass notes to the GM). And if you can see the slightest opportunity for advancement, take it from someone else. The attitude that "everyone ought to help each other" only works if everyone follows it. Nobody follows it in Paranoia, and if you try, you'll end up getting killed six times in six minutes.

• Character complexity. In other games, you're playing the role of a character. You might get attatched to your unique character, and genuinely worried that they might die. In Paranoia, death is only a matter of course, and in any case any breach of conformity, let alone uniqueness, is treated with suspicion.

• Separation of IC and OOC. While we're at it, assume that anything you, the player, say aloud will be interpreted as what your character says. This is why it's vitally important not to make snide comments that could be interpreted as IC that will get you killed.

• Treasure and Loot. Other games reward you for your hard work and experience with weapons and money and special powers and stuff. In Paranoia, your powers will be nigh-uncontrollable, your experimental weaponry will constantly backfire (hey, it's experimentall), and if the Computer rewards you with credits, you'll have to be properly cleared to spend 'em on anything.

• Comprehensive skills, attributes, and combat abilities. Many other games involve elaborate combat systems, movement rules, skills for everything except sex, that kinda thing. In Paranoia, you really have no control over that kind of thing -- in many cases, making yourself look good may be more important than the actual roll of the 20-sided die.

• Arguing with the GM. In other, non-fun games, you can theoretically argue with the GM over why, with all your stats and the equipment you've got, you should have succeeded on that dice roll instead of failed. This is one of the reasons these games are non-fun. In Paranoia, forget it. Arguing with the Gm won't do you any good, and since the GM has clearance Ultraviolet and you're doubtful to get beyond Yellow, the GM will probably execute you. Well, your current clone, anyway. (Or not. You never can tell with some GMs.)

The Stats

All of these are between 1 and 20, 1 being lowest and 20 being highest. 20 is like Neo. 1 is like Peewee Herman. 11 is about average.

• Strength - How strong you are.
• Endurance - How well you can handle getting beaten up; general stamina.
• Dexterity - Hand-eye coordination. How well you can aim.
• Agility - Coordination of just about everything else. How well you can dance.
• Chutzpah - Guts. How well can you convince someone of something outrageous?
• Moxie - Comprehension/learning/intelligence skills. Figuring out mazes, or new languages, or RPG rules.
• Mechanical Aptitude - Skill with machines.
• Power - Basically, how well you can understand and use your Mutant Power. You won't know this.