View source for Self-pity

{{short description|Feeling sorry for oneself}}
{{Use dmy dates|date=September 2020}}
{{refimprove|date=August 2014}}{{Emotion}}
'''Self-pity''' is an [[emotion]] in which one feels self-centered [[Sorrow (emotion)|sorrow]] and [[pity]] toward the self regarding one's own internal and external experiences of suffering.<ref name=":0" /> Self-pity has also been defined as an emotion "directed towards others with the goal of [[Attention seeking|attracting attention]], [[empathy]], or help" <ref name=":0">{{cite journal|last=Stober|first=J|year=2003|title=Self-Pity: Exploring the Links to Personality, Control Beliefs, and Anger|url=http://kar.kent.ac.uk/4477/1/Stoeber_Self-Pity_2003.pdf|journal=Journal of Personality|volume=71|issue=2|pages=183–220|doi=10.1111/1467-6494.7102004|pmid=12693515}}</ref><ref>{{Cite web|url=https://www.researchgate.net/publication/330203988|title=Self-Pity and The Knot Theory of Mind|last=Petric|first=Domina|date=January 2019|website=ResearchGate}}</ref>

==Description/ Definition ==
The feeling of self-pity typically arises when an individual attributes failures to external factors perceived as uncontrollable.<ref>{{Cite journal|last=Weiner|first=Bernard|date=2014-10-01|title=The Attribution Approach to Emotion and Motivation: History, Hypotheses, Home Runs, Headaches/Heartaches|url=https://doi.org/10.1177/1754073914534502|journal=Emotion Review|language=en|volume=6|issue=4|pages=353–361|doi=10.1177/1754073914534502|issn=1754-0739}}</ref> Although the primary focus of self-pity is on the [[Psychology of self|self]] and one's own emotions, it has a strong [[Interpersonal relationship|interpersonal]] component as well. In addition to [[loneliness]], subjects may also feel "[[envy]], blame, [[anger]], and [[hostility]] directed towards others".<ref name=":0" />

However, it is also very common for  people suffering from self-pity to deflect criticism of themselves; they are usually incapable of [[self-reflection]] and blame their bad situation only on external factors, such as bad luck or other people's supposed resentment.{{Citation needed|date=March 2020}}

Self-pity is different from [[self-compassion]], which consists of extending [[compassion]] to oneself in cases of failure or general [[suffering]].

== Effects ==
The research based on observation on self-pity is very slim, but the research that is available shows that self-pity can be an effect from a stressor of a dramatic event. It can also be shown that aspects of one's personality can affect one's self-pity. Although others initially respond to self-pity with empathic concern, the interpersonal effects of frequent expression of self-pity can be detrimental. Individuals who engage in pervasive self-pity may be more likely to be rejected by their peers and may commonly be perceived as querulous.<ref name=":0" />

== Treatment ==
As self-pity is observed to be associated with [[Rumination (psychology)|rumination]] and [[Avoidance coping|avoidance]] coping strategies, it is an important emotional experience to acknowledge in therapeutic settings.<ref name=":0" />

==See also==
* [[Moral emotions]]
* [[Pity]]
* [[Self-conscious emotions]]
*[[Self-compassion]]
* [[Social emotions]]
* [[Victim playing]]
* [[Victim mentality]]
*[[Pity (film)|''Pity'' (film)]] – movie about the emotion

==References==
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[[Category:Emotions]]
[[Category:Self]]